__________Living In A World Of Confusions----------

Thursday, February 03, 2005

\Disgrace//

I'm such a great disappointment.I'll hate myself for life because of my weak-mindedness.I'm really in great agony now.My shin feels like being pricked with needles.My muscles burns.My ankles are so weak I can't walk properly and stumbles at times.I'm literally living on pain-killers 24/7.But everthing pales in comparison with the fact that I just lost it big time.I know I can do it but why must everything mess up at the most crucial interval.When expectations are rising,why did I have to crack under the pressure?

The warming up was terrible,just didn't stretch properly because of the Archilles heel injury.In my final resort,pain-killer was used to mask the seething pain just before running.The first 2.4 was simply great cos I did it under 10 mins.If the first half was a heavenly start,then the return leg was absolute hell.After passing the halfway mark my ankle just collasped and a searing pain ripped through my tendons.The pain-killer concealed the initial pain so well that I did not notice it until it became aggravated.I just hanged on,picked myself up and tried to pick up the pace to overtake 50 plus runners.

After a couple of minutes,my ankle gave way again.I just couldn't stand anymore my legs were trembling but had no choice other then to limp my way back for the next 2k.When I am sufficiently near the finishing line,I had no choice but to give a final burst of speed in a bid to salvage a lost cause.My both ankles were really useless at that point,showing hints of giving way.Fortunately I managed to collapse past the finishing line,I just could not stand up.I fear that I had just torn the muscles and some runners had to carry me to the line to end the race.

Ended up being carried to the medic tent.If maran was there he would have labelled me as a bloody bunch of disgrace.Its true that what had happened is really disgraceful.I really wanted to do much better.I should have endured the pain throughout the race had I been more strong-willed.

Sorry guys,I messed up.I really didn't want things to turn out this way.I really want to win this class event very badly.

I'm Confused|11:08 PM|

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